Today I took the Bean to a trial day at our local Little Gym. That’s right it is a toddler gym and this class was filled with kids her age. With fun toddler activities always on my mind, I have seen the gym and thought about going for ages now but I have always talked myself out of it. For one thing it is expensive and well I just figured why pay for a gym for toddlers when we can go to the park for free. However the air is cooling, the mittens and hats have come out and the morning grass is often covered in frost so in an attempt to break up the monotony of being inside, off we went. The toddler gym exceeded every expectation and the Bean LOVED it. She did front rolls and back rolls and ran through the obstacle course. She climbed on the balance beam and played with the balls. She was in heaven and I was deflated. While I am always keeping my eye out for a job that makes my return to interior design full time, I am a stay at home mom and that means we are a one income family, which means that we do not have money for this gym. It means that despite the fun she had, we are going to have to forgo this experience for the time being and it breaks my heart. I want to give her everything and while I know she will be fine if we do not go to these classes, I will know in my heart that her experience could be better. When I am helping her do a summersault across the playroom floor, I will know what she is missing. I want her to grow up going to gymnastics and swim lessons, I want her to be able to tell everyone that she has been doing these things since she was a baby. I want her to have all the things that I did not have but wished I would have. I grew up envious of the kids that got to go to Girl Scouts and gymnastics and the kids that got to play summer tee ball. I wanted those experiences as a kid and I want the Bean to have those opportunities. I want to give her the world on a silver platter but I am on a Happy Meal budget so for the time being we will simply continue to play at home as I save up in hopes of taking her next year. I will continue searching for fun toddler activities and we will make our playroom a magical place with good books and a little imagination. Of course, just in case Santa saw her smiling and laughing as she danced around today…my little Bean has been a very good girl this year.